Summary Edit

Howard Bairstowes is a complete glutton for food! No matter what any of his friends or family tries, they can't get him to stop eating. He snacks on vodka jello shots first thing in the morning. At work he sneaks vodka jello shots into board meetings. What can be done with Howard Bairstowes?

Director Edit

Walter K. Drumpfauz

Cast Edit

Top Trivia Edit

Director Drumpfauz originally wanted to cast Greg Caperducci in the role of Howard Bairstowes, but failed to take into account that the actor was 99 years old.

Notable Quotes Edit

Grandma: Howard! Every time I walk in on you, you're chowing down! How much have you eaten today?

Howard: Well, let's see... I had six vodka jello shots for morning tea. Then I had twelve vodka jello shots for lunch. And now I'm just enjoying a mid-afternoon snack of seven or eight vodka jello shots.

Grandma: Oh, Howard, you're such a glutton!

Critical Reception Edit

"A harrowing tale of food abuse and the world that refuses to see it." - Tom Shankley, Morning Postage